The Quiet Strength of Leadership and Integrity

A Möbius strip made from a single green leaf — a symbol of sustainable growth, continuity, and transformation in nature and business.

Most people talk about integrity and leadership as if they are bright, bold words etched into marble. They get printed on corporate walls and quoted in performance reviews. However, the most powerful leadership I’ve encountered—and tried to embody—is something quieter. It is something lowercase.

This isn’t a gimmick or a play on words. It is a significant shift in how we think, show up, and hold ourselves accountable.

The Problem with Capital Letters

When we hear "Leadership" or "Integrity" in uppercase, there is a certain charge to them. They come with expectations and pressures. You are either a "leader," or you’re not. You either "have integrity," or you don't. Life is messier than that. People are often much more complicated.

That's why I've adopted lowercase. Leadership with a small "l" means we all have opportunities to lead moment by moment, whether as parents, siblings, friends, or professionals. And integrity with a small "i"? It signifies not grand proclamations of moral purity, but subtle, often invisible alignment with our values in real-time.

Redefining Integrity

As a trained mathematician, I returned to the basics. In engineering, integrity refers to something that maintains its structure under pressure. In mathematics, an integer is a whole number without fractions or in-betweens. That’s where this idea originated for me: lowercase integrity focuses on wholeness, not perfection.

It’s not about having integrity like it’s a trophy. It’s about asking, in this very moment: Am I in integrity with what I value? This is a live check-in. It's not about labeling ourselves.

That check-in revolves around three core values: courage, humility, and curiosity. Am I being courageous? Am I humble enough to acknowledge my mistakes? Am I curious, or am I acting defensively?

This framework is simple but not always easy.

The Team That Taught Me

I once led a project with a prestigious client. I had a plan, endorsements, and approval. Then my team—young, energetic, and brilliant—brought me a completely different idea. For a moment, I froze. Anger crept in. This wasn’t the plan I had.

Then I caught myself, hearing that little internal buzz, saying, “This is a moment. Pay attention.” I listened and stayed curious. It turned out they were right. Their concept was superior. I faced a choice: protect my ego or act in integrity. Courage meant returning to the client and my boss to explain: “We’re changing course.”

That was not easy. But it was authentic. That is the type of leadership I strive to embody.

Practice, Not Perfection

I always give this tip to my clients: select two or three values that are vital to you. Just two or three. Then, every few hours, ask yourself: Am I living in integrity with these values? This is not a judgment but an exploration.

You will be surprised by what you discover. You will start leading your life instead of just performing it.

The Infinite Loop

If you are like me—a bit of a geek—you will appreciate this idea: it’s an infinite loop. Know yourself. Be true to yourself. Then know yourself again. Why? Because you have changed.

That’s lowercase integrity. It’s not a title, a trophy, or a declaration. It’s simply presence. It’s practice. It’s one more round.

And if you mess up? Good. That means you’re paying attention.

Welcome to the real work of leadership.

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Final Thought: Leadership, Integrity, and Exit

Leadership with a lowercase l, and integrity with a lowercase i, are not just philosophical concepts. They carry practical weight, especially when you are planning an exit.

You never create a perfect business; you navigate it. Moment to moment, choice by choice.

And perfection? That’s not a destination. It’s a question: “What do I want perfection to mean for me?”

That is what true leadership appears to be when it's time to let go.

Embracing the Journey

In this journey of leadership and integrity, remember that each moment is an opportunity. Leading with a lowercase l encourages us to embrace simplicity and transparency in our actions. Each choice we make influences not only our path but those around us.

Living in integrity means making a conscious effort to align our actions with our values. When we do this, we cultivate an environment of trust, respect, and authenticity. It shapes our organizations, families, and communities.

Moreover, whole-number-like integrity is about fostering connections with others. Courage encourages meaningful conversations. Humility allows us to learn from our mistakes. Curiosity opens our minds to new perspectives. This blend enhances our relationships and fosters growth.

To thrive in leadership, we must also be adaptable. The landscape of business and personal interactions constantly changes. Each new experience offers insights—lessons we can carry into our next endeavors.

So, let’s continue this journey together. Reflect on your values, strive for lowercase integrity, and embrace the beauty of leading in everyday moments.